Knocking likes he’s done a thousand times before, the only difference now is that he’s the very last person I expected to see on the other side of the door. The emotions I felt each time looking at his face since we met hit me all at once and left me completely stunned. Too many questions to count in my head were unable to be asked as my kids were doing the questioning instead. Deterred by words I regret leaving unspoken since our last conversation, I was wary on how this one would go but I could tell by the look on his face that he’s the one who needed to get things off his chest. The immediate problem at hand was that he was unable to do any talking. Every time he opened his mouth not a single sound came out. In absolute panic we both were as he couldn’t speak and I could sense that there was a dire message he came here to deliver. Even after years of no contact and the times I wished he was there for me the way I was for him, I consoled him as much as possible because in this moment it was what he needed. With every fiber of my being though I remained in utter fear and confusion because without a doubt I could sense something unavoidable was on it’s way.
Those horrible feelings I felt in my premonition, that vividly real dream were unshakable even after I sprang awake with the sun beaming through the blinds that morning. “What in the entire F*CK (insert his name here)?!” was all that I could think.
Less than an hour after that, one of my very first loves, my Grandma suffered a stroke and was on her way to the hospital.
Just about a week after that, my beloved Grandmother passed away.